A Letter Home

Dear Folks,
Well, I just wanted all of you to know that once more I have landed on my feet. There was a terrible storm a couple of weeks ago, with lots of noise and lights and it scared me into early labor. I'm not used to so much activity and worry over how my siblings were faring in such really had me in a tizzy. The children were just soaking wet and I feared they might drown. Suddenly this red car pulled into the parking lot of the building where I had found some shelter. I had the kids up on the loading dock and made plenty of noise when I heard activity in the back hall way. The door opened and the giant on the other side looked down at me and my little brood and sighed. Heavily. I don't think he was to pleased to see us, but he didn't chase us away either. He left for a bit, then came back out with a box. I watched, holding my breath, as he scooped the children up and put them in the box. He turned to go inside, then looked back at me and said, "well, are you coming in?" Of course I was coming in. What's he think, I'm nuts?

He got this small warm air machine and began to dry and warm the children, then he turned it to me. Not liking this new turn of events, I ran behind this big chair, and washed and dried myself. What's he think, I'm a baby? So anyway, after we were all warmed up, I got in with the babies and they had a good meal. I heard the giant leave the room, and when he returned, he had a bowl of milk and some sort of meat broken up in the dish. He called it chicken, and I was amazed. Did you know that lizard tastes like chicken? He kept asking me where I had come from and how I had ended up at the Progressive Journal. I tried to tell him that I needed a job to support me and my family and that I was an excellent Copycat, that there was no job around a newspaper that I couldn't tackle with finesse and speed. And judging from the mouse droppings I hadn't gotten here a minute to soon.

I saw him pick up this little square gizmo and start talking into it. I think he called it a cell. Didn't look like any cell that I'd ever seen before, but I took his word for it. So whoever was on the other end ( he called her Mom) he was telling her about my plight and asking if there was any room at the inn. Seriously, he asked if THERE WAS ANY ROOM AT THE INN! At first all I could hear was laughter coming from the other end of the thing he called a cell. A laughing cell. Now that I could handle. He explained that along with me, there were five little ones and that he couldn't keep us here. There seemed to be some conversation on the other end and after a bit he put all of us in the red car. He told me I couldn't drive and kept moving me away from the steering wheel. I had never traveled so fast and the scenery was fascinating. We turned down this long drive and I saw a house and trees. Man there are a lot of trees here. It's like Disneyland. So anyway, we stopped next to this house and a lady giant came out and hugged the man giant and then they stood looking down at the children. The lady giant was telling the man giant that I was so ugly I was cute. What does she mean ugly? She started calling me Puddinhead immediately. How did she know what you call me, Mama? I tried to tell her my name was Shaherazade but she just won't say it.

So, I have this nice house just off the porch, we are all warm and comfy, meal times come regularly at 6 am and 6 pm and we have all the rest of the day to do our own thing. Today I went exploring with the pair of giants who live here. I found their garden to my liking. And the woods are wonderful. I met this really bossy squirrel who told me to stay off his tree. Like, I didn't see his name on it, so what's he on about? Anyway Mom, I just wanted all of you to know that we're safe and don't worry about us. I don't know why they call this the Crazy Cat Lady's house. She doesn't seem at all crazy to me. I think she may be my gift from the Maker.

Love
Shaherazade

alias "Puddinhead"